Complacency can be a love-hate feeling. One could be very comfortable and proud where they are in life–unaware of the need to make any changes. Whereas someone else could be too comfortable and know they should make some changes, but are simply too stuck in their ways.

For me as a stay-at-home mom, complacency toggles in the back of my mind like a ping pong game. For a lot of us, on one end we’re extremely happy with being home with our little ones and taking care on the home front. And on the other end, we’re crying in the shower beating ourselves up asking how I could lose myself. But, I’m learning to recondition my thoughts. I often talk about what I’m not doing as opposed to what I am doing, which is just as good. This negative thinking is a weakness that I’m not afraid to admit I have, because I know it’s something I need to work on.

Oftentimes when people think of growth, they get afraid because with growth comes change. Me, me (in my Dallas voice) I am this person. Every time I think of all the dreams I had as a young girl, and how in the world I could begin to fulfil them now, I always talk myself out of the. But, not anymore! This is the year I’m challenging myself to break out of that shell, and I encourage you to break out of yours too.

Jarrod and I were talking the other day about what I wanted to do post basketball, and I honestly couldn’t figure out why I didn’t push harder to keep going with my dream job. I let one thing turn me off and that was it, I didn’t want to do it. And now here I am feeling like I’m too far removed and feeling like I lost it because I became too comfortable with everything else going on in my life. (Oh and when motherhood comes into play, you really feel like you’ve gone down the rabbit hole of mom life lol.) To overcome this complacency and “purpose regret,” I’ve created key steps that I will follow, which are based on research and purpose finding I’ve done thus far, and I invite you to join me. Hopefully these steps can help lead you to letting go of your weakness and living your best life in 2020.

Steps to Overcoming Complacency

1. Don’t be afraid to be influenced by others. I’ve said this a million times on my blog, and I know some of you may be tired of reading it. But when I started the Miss Society it was because someone outside of my circle pushed me to do it. And I’m ever so grateful for her. Sometimes, it takes that one person you think isn’t paying you any attention who’s really thinking “Girl you got a story to tell!” or “You can do it!” So, be open to the possibility of increasing your circle to positive influence!
2. Don’t sell yourself short. Don’t put yourself in a box and get comfortable with everyday life. Nothing happens overnight. Even if you do a little at a time that’s more than you did before. One small action a day will get you out of your comfort zone before you know it. You’ve got this!
3. Go out and explore. Ask questions. Don’t be afraid to reach out to that one person that’s been on your list to learn more about/from. You never know, you may get a response you’ve been longing for. And don’t be afraid to explore what others are doing that will only spark your interest and get you more inspired.

I remember having a conversation about complacency with a few friends at a bbq a few years back. How we got on this topic, who knows? And why we went all deep into it instead of continuing on with our game of UNO, who knows? But we did, and it was so necessary! Because I care so much about y’all — my Socialite Circle — I have to share these steps above and the high point of our convo to help you from falling victim to complacency. The main takeaway, “Never become too comfortable or happy with life so much that you kill the desire to grow!

This year we aren’t being complacent with our weakness! Let’s challenge ourselves to do more, live more, and worry less. Life’s too short to worry about the “what if’s.” So we are going to step out of our comfort zone and embrace being uncomfortable with open arms.